New Moon Meeting: February 2005, 3:45 EST
Attributes of The Ideal Bride

Zahakiel: Luke, can you please pray for us?

Qinael: Okay.

Father,

We thank you for this time that you have given us to come together for cleansing and for bonding... We pray that your Spirit and your angels be with and attend to us during this meeting, and may our hearts and minds be open to grasp and apply what you have for us this day. In Yahshua’s name, amen.

Zahakiel: Amen.
Pastor “Chick”: Amen.
Barb: Amen.
Dumah: Amen.
Crystle: Amen.
Ron Odem: Amen.

Zahakiel: All right, during the last month, I got a couple good suggestions for our New Moon topic. One of them was based on a previous study we have done – that of the roles of men and women. In that study, we saw that having a different role was not the same thing as the existence of an inequality, and I decided to go a bit further with that this month. Going off of our basis, that every true doctrine will find its root in Yahweh’s character, we find that the Father and Son are equal (Phl 2:6) – yet the Son has made Himself subject to the Father for the sake of the Creation. (John 14:28)

Those who are able to see the harmony of these two ideas can appreciate the beauty of a marriage arrangement according to Scriptural principles, that the wife is subject to the husband (Eph 5:22) – yet they are equal in Heaven’s sight. (Gal 3:28)

Everyone with me so far?

Qinael: Yes.
Crystle: Yes.
Barb: Yes.
Ron Odem: Yes.
Pastor “Chick”: With you.

Zahakiel: Okay, so the statement was asked: I can see that the roles may be different, but what exactly IS the role of the woman, both in spiritual and earthly things? I am paraphrasing, of course, but that is the idea. And I do think it is an important topic, not only for the women to know, but also the men... because we, as the Bride of Christ, are subject to the Savior in just the same way a wife is to her husband, and many of the responsibilities translate easily from one model to another.

The best place to start is a chapter of Proverbs that describes a godly wife, for as the Psalm says, “Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of Yahweh.” (Psa 18:22)

I heard someone give a brief commentary on this verse once, and though I can’t remember who it was, I remember what he said. “The verse does not say, ‘whoso findeth a woman and maketh of her a wife,’ it says ‘whoso findeth a wife.’” Now, here is an important matter... just as the stones for the temple needed to be ready before they were brought to the construction site (1 Kings 6:7) – and we looked at this during the study sessions last Camp Meeting – so the wife must be made a wife before the marriage takes place. This is true regarding both earthly marriages and spiritual. If a man does not consider a woman “wifely” before the ceremony, he should not expect her to fit his idea of what a wife should be after.

While people in the world, particularly the men, tend to run after appearance, they often give little thought to character. Does she love Christ more than anything else? Is she patient, and kind, and modest? Does she have that meekness of spirit that the KJV translates (a little awkwardly) as “shamefacedness” in 1Tim 2:9? These are some of the qualities that make up a godly wife, and to a certain extent define the “role” she will play.

Zahakiel: Now, in our last study I said the following regarding roles:

In a godly marriage, likewise, the husband gives great responsibilities to the wife. “The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.” (Proverbs 31:11) “She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.” (verse 16) “She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.” (verse 27) “Give her of the fruit of her hands; and let her own works praise her in the gates.” (Verse 31)

Zahakiel: We did not go into detail then, so we will do that now, to some degree. But before we do that let’s see if we can extract some more characteristics from Proverbs 31. Some other relevant verses:

“She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.” (verse 13) “She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.” (verse 18) “She stretcheth out her hand to the poor; yea, she reacheth forth her hands to the needy.” (verse 20) “Strength and honour are her clothing; and she shall rejoice in time to come. She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness.” (25, 26) “Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.” (28)

Let me know when you have read these over.

Qinael: Finished.
Crystle: Finished.
Pastor “Chick”: Amen.
Barb: Finished.
Ron Odem: Finished.

Zahakiel: Ok :) Now, let us see if we can come up with a reasonable list of qualities to be possessed by a good wife. Go ahead and look those verses over (those from both sets) and give me some characteristics:

Qinael: Diligent worker, patient, giving (to the poor in particular)... A teacher of righteousness, honorable...

Zahakiel: Any others? (both qualities and people)

Crystle: Wise and kind, thankful for what she has.

Qinael: A good housekeeper, trustworthy, responsible with the house and its assets… Wise with finances.

Crystle: Is a good steward and does not waste.

Zahakiel: Okay, good. And I’d like to add some others to that list as well. So far we have Trustworthy, capable, a diligent worker (or industrious), giving (or kind), wise, honorable. To those I would add discerning, willing, alert, effective (although Luke covered that when he said responsible with house and assets).

Crystle: Honest, strong yet meek.

Zahakiel: And from that last verse I saw that she was praiseworthy... Good, Strong is another one :) Okay, consolidating these... With what you’ve given me and what I had in mind, we seem to have come up with 12 reasonably distinct characteristics (and a good number, too).

I’ll list them, and discuss them, in this way: 1) Trustworthy, 2) Discerning, 3) Capable, 4) Industrious, 5) Willing, 6) Kind, 7) Alert, 8) Effective 9) Strong, 10) Honorable, 11) Wise, 12) Praiseworthy.

Zahakiel: We will see how these characteristics involve the actions she performs in her role – and how WE as a Church perform in our role as the Bride of Christ.

1) Trustworthy:
One of the verses from which we can draw this characteristic is the first one listed: “The heart of her husband doth safely trust in her, so that he shall have no need of spoil.” (Proverbs 31:11)

In a human marriage, the husband can depend on the wife. In the beginning it was written, “And Yahweh the Almighty said, “It is not good that the man should be alone; I will make him an help meet for him.” (Gen 2:18) Eve was created to be a helper who was suitable for Adam. Where he was weak she would be strong, and vice versa; they were complementary. You might say that part of the reason the human race was plunged into sin was because there was a breakdown in trust – first between Eve and Adam, and then between Adam and Yah.

Remember, Eve was not yet created when the instruction regarding the Tree of the Knowledge of Good and Evil was created. The instruction came in Gen 2:15-17, just before the decision to create the woman was made known to Adam. Eve’s primary instructor on this matter was Adam, and this will make sense in a clear parallel to how the Church operates today. Yah puts certain people in the roles of teachers, prophets, pastors... He does not always lead every individual member by visions and revelations. He has ordered His universe, even the earth’s broken system, along a hierarchy, and we looked at that to some degree in our first study on roles.

Zahakiel: But again, this hierarchy only really works if there is trust. If there is order without trust, we get dictatorship. If people are placed above us, and we are obligated to obey them despite the fact that we do not believe their instructions will be useful or pleasant, that is bondage. Paul tells us that Eve was “deceived,” and the primary result of this deception was to get her to doubt Adam’s instructions, and ultimately Yah’s law – His one spoken restriction. There was a breakdown of trust; and so you see it is good that we discussed this attribute first, because it really is foundational to any role the wife may play.

There can be obedience without trust, but just like Yahshua, an earthly husband who truly loves his wife will hate the very idea. There are many wives who may think in their hearts about their husbands what some of the lost will say to the Bridegroom in the day of judgment: “Did I not do many wonderful works because you asked me to (i.e. in your name)?” But just as the Savior replies to the goats, “I never knew you,” so the husband and a wife in a relationship lacking in trust do not “know” each other in any meaningful way.

Now if we apply this to the Church, the principle should have many obvious applications. The primary one is this: “Go ye into all the world, and preach the Gospel to every creature.” (Mark 16:15) This, the “Great Commission” was one of the last things Christ said to His disciples as a group. This statement implies a great deal of trust, for at the time Yahshua said this, not even the most thoughtful of the apostles was exactly clear on what the “Gospel” even was... Yet He did not send them out alone; He gave them the instruction to wait until Pentecost, when they would be equipped for the task. So then, if the husband’s role in this instance is to provide for the wife, the wife’s role is to take those provisions and put them to use – and of course without the wife being a trustworthy woman, the husband would not feel any great compulsion to place what he has earned at the cost of the sweat of his brow into her hands.

Zahakiel: Any questions on the first characteristic? And we have eleven more to go, so we cannot spend too very long on any one specific.

Qinael: I have none.
Barb: No.
Crystle: None here.
Ron Odem: None.
Zahakiel: All right :)

2) Discerning:
We read the verse: “She considereth a field, and buyeth it: with the fruit of her hands she planteth a vineyard.” (16) And also a part of this verse: “She perceiveth that her merchandise is good...” (18)

A godly wife (a godly anyone, really) can tell the difference between good and evil – between bad and good. More generally, she can tell the difference between holy and unholy, wisdom and folly, usefulness and worthlessness, a good idea and a bad idea... all of these. Discernment is being able to tell the difference in the quality of various things. If I offer to give you a coin made of copper or a coin made of gold... both may be shiny and bright, but if you can “discern” the difference between them you will choose the golden coin.

If a husband trusts his wife, he may give her the role of seeing to his personal affairs as they relate to the home. Happy is the man who can trust his wife enough to give her the authority to consider and buy a field! Fields were important commodities – often, if you did not have good fields, you did not eat; and in verse 16 we see that to a large extent the life of a family is in the hands of the wife. If a wife has shown herself faithful with a few resources, a wise husband will be content to have her deal with more. It is important to remember, of course, that the man is the one ultimately responsible to Yah for how that family has invested its talents, including money; but if the wife has high discernment “the heart of her husband doth safely trust in her,” as the Scripture says.

We have already looked at the spiritual application, really, when I referenced this passage that I will quote in full here:
“After a long time the lord of those servants cometh, and reckoneth with them. And so he that had received five talents came and brought other five talents, saying, ‘Lord, thou deliveredst unto me five talents: behold, I have gained beside them five talents more.’ His lord said unto him, ‘Well done, thou good and faithful servant: thou hast been faithful over a few things, I will make thee ruler over many things: enter thou into the joy of thy lord.’” (Mat 25:19 – 21)

Zahakiel: Say when you have read.

Qinael: Finished.
Pastor “Chick”: OK.
Barb: Done.
Ron Odem: Finished.
Crystle: Finished.

Zahakiel: All right. Now, in the Book of Acts we see that as the apostles were faithful preaching to a few, their audience quickly increased. Of course, godly Churches are not always rich, or popular... and in the last days, it can hardly be expected that a straight message of judgment, righteousness by faith, victory over all sin, unity, healthy living.... it can hardly be expected that these things will be grasped by the majority of humans. The love of many have grown cold, and we have seen people stumbling over one, or many... or ALL of these aspects of the Gospel in our diverse experiences.

But now, our job is not to be popular, it is to be faithful... and like Noah, the “many things” with which we are rewarded will be revealed after the judgment has come and gone. (Mat 5:12) We have to be able to discern a heavenly reward from an earthly as well, as we do this work.

3) Capable.
The Bible says, “And [Yahshua] gave some, apostles; and some, prophets; and some, evangelists; and some, pastors and teachers; for the perfecting of the saints, for the work of the ministry, for the edifying of the Body of Christ.” (Eph 4:11, 12) Basically: what we need to do, we will be equipped to do. We have looked at the spiritual application first, but a godly human bride is the same way. She is skilled, having developed her talents (whatever they may have been to start out with), to the point they can be a blessing to herself and her family.

The Proverb says, “She perceiveth that her merchandise is good.” We used this to point out that she can tell what is good and what is not... but this also tells us that her merchandise, the work of her hands, IS good that she may discern it as such. Now, what happens if a wife possesses both trustworthiness and capability? In such a case, not only does the husband give her authority over his resources, but he will actually see the benefit of doing so. And of course she cannot be capable if she is not able to discern the direction in which she is to put forth her efforts, so these attributes really build one upon the other.

A capable wife has talents she can use for the good of her family and others; Paul writes of a couple of aspects of the woman’s role very clearly, “I will therefore that the younger women marry, bear children, guide the house, give none occasion to the adversary to speak reproachfully.” (1 Tim 5:14) It certainly takes a lot to “guide the house,” or as Luke put it... to be a good housekeeper and manage the house and its assets well. And now Yahshua expects HIS Wife to be capable and trustworthy in the same way. He expects Her to be a good decision-maker.

Zahakiel: Consider this passage: “Verily I say unto you, Whatsoever ye shall bind on earth shall be bound in heaven: and whatsoever ye shall loose on earth shall be loosed in heaven. Again I say unto you, That if two of you shall agree on earth as touching any thing that they shall ask, it shall be done for them of my Father which is in heaven.” (Mat 18:18) Two chapters before this, Yahshua said this to Peter; but here He says it to all His disciples.

Now, some groups like the Catholics have taken this concept (especially the one spoken to Peter) and used it to do some interesting things with Biblical doctrine. Based upon this “authority,” they have changed, by their own admission, many of the instructions set forth in the Bible. Well, to be perfectly accurate, some of these changes took place before the Church was officially called the “Roman Catholic Church,” and the instructions were not actually “changed.” By that I mean... anyone can pick up a Bible and read the instructions: “Remember the Sabbath day to keep it holy... the 7th day is the Sabbath of Yahweh your Almighty.” (for example) They did not have the power to actually change the instructions... BUT, they did the next best thing – they kept the instruction manual out of the hands of the people for a long time, and substituted the decisions of their councils for the commandments.

Even when the instructions were returned to the nations due to the heroic efforts of some very brave men... the traditions had become so entrenched in the way most READ the instructions that they started making excuses for the changes that were made. This is “Capable” taken to an extreme it was not supposed to attain – and this speaks directly to role. Consider that in our example above the man selling the field does not see the husband, but the wife coming to appraise his land for purchase. Yet here the wife is really acting under the authority of the husband. If the wife just goes out and starts buying fields, or houses, or planning out the family budget – unless she has been given the authority to do so – she is being capable, yes... but she is doing what the Church did anciently, and stepping out of her role.

I actually had a discussion about this once with a woman who was a member of the RCC Church. She wrote me an email saying, “Did you not read in Matthew where Christ gave great authority to Peter? Why do you claim that the pope cannot change the day of rest, or the manner of worship?” My response was: “Yes, I agree. Great responsibility was given to Peter – about that we have no dispute. Yet Peter’s authority was as a representative of the Church, the Bride of Christ. If a bride wrests authority from her husband simply because he has acknowledged her abilities, she has stepped out of Gospel order... and needs to be reproved.”

I never did get an email in response, but I would have been interested in seeing what she had to say to that.

Zahakiel: Any questions on what we have covered so far?

Qinael: I have none.
Ron Odem: None.
Pastor “Chick”: OK.
Crystle: No.
Barb: No.
Dumah: Nope.

Zahakiel: All right...
4) Industrious:
This is different from merely being capable. It’s explained in how one of you worded it above: Diligent worker. A person may have great abilities, yet never develop them... or even great developed abilities, but never use them. Industriousness means that she is doing something with her abilities. The sections that indicate this are: “She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness.” (verse 27) “She seeketh wool, and flax, and worketh willingly with her hands.” (verse 13) These two are probably the most direct.

In the New Testament, we read that the women should be “adorned” with good works. (1Tim 2:9, 10) Of course, every member of the Body of Yahshua should have this characteristic in full measure, for there is a general statement that reads: “For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, that if any would not work, neither should he eat. For we hear that there are some which walk among you disorderly, working not at all, but are busybodies. Now them that are such we command and exhort by our Lord Jesus Christ, that with quietness they work, and eat their own bread.” (2Th 3:10 – 12)

At this point it will be good to introduce another specific role of women in a godly family, based on this characteristic. We have already seen the passage where Paul says he would have younger women “marry, bear children, guide the house;” and there is this also: “And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.” (1Tim 2:14, 15) Now, some people may look at that verse rather suspiciously (or avoid it if possible), because at first glace it appears that Paul is saying women may only be saved if they have children, or that the woman’s purpose is to merely be a “factory” for babies. This is absolutely not the case, for we can only get an author’s true feelings about a subject by reading ALL that he or she has to say on that specific topic.

In other places, for example, Paul quotes, “For it is written, ‘Rejoice, thou barren that bearest not; break forth and cry, thou that travailest not: for the desolate hath many more children than she which hath an husband.’” (Gal 4:27) And again, during the time in his ministry when Paul believed the return of Yahshua would be in his day he said, “I say therefore to the unmarried and widows, It is good for them if they abide even as I [unmarried].” (1Cor 7:8) And again, “Now concerning virgins I have no commandment of the Lord: yet I give my judgment, as one that hath obtained mercy of the Lord to be faithful.” (verse 25) Paul therefore did not “command” that all women should get married and bear children, and he did not command the reverse.

Zahakiel: The barren may have many children spiritually; and for the unmarried, Paul’s opinion was that they should not expend energy seeking a husband. If a woman’s salvation depended on her childbearing, this would hardly be good advice. But now in 1Tim 2, Paul is saying that IF a woman becomes a mother, she will be aiding both her own salvation experience (and certainly those of her children) “if [she] continue[s] in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.” The idea about not working = not eating is key here, for where would an individual learn the way of idleness?

Qinael: The parents, or one raising them.

Zahakiel: Right :) The Scriptures tell us, “Train up a child in the way he should go: and when he is old, he will not depart from it.” (Proverbs 22:6) Now, things like trustworthiness, discernment and capability may be taught, that is true... but industriousness is a habit that is most clearly the result of having a good example before you. It doesn’t matter how many times I watch someone play a piano; if I have no interest in that instrument or natural skill I will probably not learn it very well. I cannot so easily develop that capability. Discernment is something that (if not already a part of you) most easily comes from personal Bible study and prayer. Trustworthiness is something that is earned... but to a large degree based upon your diligence anyway. And so we see that in the matter of industry, it falls in a large degree to the woman to train her children in this area.

The proverb there is certainly directed to both fathers and mothers, but it is the mother who generally has the most contact with children during these formative years. We are told to take the Gospel to “all the world,” and that takes effort. We are told, “And let us not be weary in well doing: for in due season we shall reap, if we faint not.” (Gal 6:9) And then Yahshua said, “No man, having put his hand to the plough, and looking back, is fit for the kingdom of God.” (Luke 9:62)

In baptism, in Church membership, we have committed our hands to the plough of the Gospel ministry... and if we will “bear children” after the manner of a godly Bride, we must maintain our efforts despite the trials, potential discouragements, and the ceaseless opposition of evil angels. If our enemies in high places do not slow their warfare, how can we afford to do so? We must be industrious.

Zahakiel: Okay...
Willing & 6) Kind:
These two go well together, and both are a bit different from “industrious,” because while “industry” speaks of actions, willingness indicates motive. Kindness is the way to describe an action that results from willingness, and that is how #5 and #6 are distinguished. When we help someone we are not obligated to help, and we do so simply because we are willing, this is a “kindness.” We may give our tithes and offerings, we may write books and articles, we may raise our children well or devote our entire lives to the smooth running of the Church – but as Paul says, “though I bestow all my goods to feed the poor, and though I give my body to be burned, and have not charity, it profiteth me nothing.” (1Cor 13:3) Of course, we all know the word “charity” there means “love,” but in English both “charity” and what “love” has come to mean fail to capture the full meaning of “Agape.” This is the godly love that, as Paul writes in the same chapter “seeketh not her own.” (verse 5)

Regarding the matter of offerings Paul says, “Every man according as he purposeth in his heart, so let him give; not grudgingly, or of necessity, for Yah loveth a cheerful giver.” (2Cor 9:7) And again we read of the offering for the Sanctuary, “This is the thing which Yahweh commanded, saying, ‘Take ye from among you an offering unto Yahweh; whosoever is of a willing heart, let him bring it, an offering of Yah; gold, and silver, and brass, etc. etc. “ (Exodus 34:5b, 6...) We read there that Moses actually had to restrain the people from bringing, because they had more than enough material. A good example for us, because in these last days it is absolutely imperative that we operate always “by pureness, by knowledge, by longsuffering, by kindness, by the Holy Ghost, by love unfeigned.” (2Cor 6:6)

Now in terms of a wife’s role regarding both her husband and children (and you see why I introduced that aspect during our discussion of #4), if she executes her duties faithfully, she may still be little more than a slave. The New Testament does not say a husband is merely to provide for his wife, or that the wife is merely to obey her husband; but rather, “Husbands, love your wives, and be not bitter against them.” (Col 3:19) “The aged women likewise [...] that they may teach the young women to be sober, to love their husbands, to love their children.” (Titus 2:3, 4) An example of loving service is one of the most useful gifts that a child can receive from his or her parent, and this is true of both physical children (of a family) and spiritual children (of a Church).

Zahakiel: Willingness and Kindness are well described as “love” in that chapter, 1 Cor 13, and so are there any questions on these two before we move on?

Qinael: No.
Ron Odem: None.
Dumah: sounds good.
Pastor “Chick”: No.

Crystle: Loving service? Can you explain that a bit more?

Zahakiel: Basically this... service is the action you perform. But if it is not done in a willing, loving way, it is still not an example worthy to follow.

Crystle: Okay... thanks. :)

Zahakiel: Ok :)

7) Alert:
As I will demonstrate, this one is different from discernment, and merits a little discussion. We could have used this verse to speak of industriousness, but I reserved it for Alertness for a reason... “She perceiveth that her merchandise is good: her candle goeth not out by night.” (Pro 31:18) We already examined the first part of that verse, but does the second half bring anything to mind? A parable, maybe?

Qinael: Well, spiritually, the ten virgins.

Zahakiel: <nods.> That is what I thought of when I read that. Let’s look at that briefly, I will post the parable here:
“Then shall the kingdom of heaven be likened unto ten Virgins, which took their lamps and went forth to meet the Bridegroom. And five of them were wise, and five were foolish. They that were foolish took their lamps, and took no oil with them, but the wise took oil in their vessels with their lamps. While the Bridegroom tarried they all slumbered and slept. And at midnight there was a cry made, ‘‘Behold, the Bridegroom cometh; go ye out to meet him.’ Then all those Virgins arose and trimmed their lamps; and the foolish said unto the wise, ‘Give us of your oil, for our lamps are gone out.’ But the wise answered, saying, ‘Not so, lest there be not enough for us and you; but go ye rather to them that sell, and buy for yourselves.’

“And while they went to buy the Bridegroom came, and they that were ready went in with him to the marriage; and the door was shut. Afterward came also the other Virgins, saying, ‘Lord, Lord, open to us.’ But He answered and said, ‘Verily I say unto you, I know you not.’ Watch therefore, for ye know neither the day nor the hour wherein the Son of man cometh.” (Mat 25:1 – 13)

Zahakiel: I will wait for you to read it all. Let me know when you are done.

Qinael: Done.
Pastor “Chick”: OK.
Ron Odem: Finished.
Tiffany: Done.
Barb: Done.
Dumah: Ok.
Crystle: Finished.

Zahakiel: Ok :)

We may be discerning, able to tell the difference between good and evil. All the Virgins in that parable were able to discern the approach of the Bridegroom, and they knew enough to take lamps in the first place. The difference was that the wise Virgins had “oil” in their lamps... and by the way, the Bible was written before “candles” were invented – so wherever you see the word “candle” like in the verse in Proverbs, it really means “lamp.” In any case, if we will be alert, we must have something to fuel that alertness. Yahshua says to His people, “watch.” If we watch, if we are alert, we will be “ready” to deal with just about any eventuality.

Dumah: Some say that it is wrong for us to “know” that we have the victory and say it.

Zahakiel: Ok. How does that factor into alertness? :)

Dumah: You mentioned, “she perceives her work is good.”

Zahakiel: Oh, a while back, yes. Well, those who cannot say they have the victory do not have the victory :)

Dumah: It is an awareness of the righteousness we have through Christ that fortifies us in the hour of darkness.

Zahakiel: That will help us in the time of trouble, as Mrs. White says.

Pastor “Chick”: If a person has a conscience, they will know if their works are “good” or “bad”...

Zahakiel: Right.

Dumah: Right...so we will know if we “need” oil... or if we “have” it.

Zahakiel: Yes.

Pastor “Chick”: Inspired commentary says that all 10 were of a “pure faith”...
(Note: That quotation is found here: “The two classes of watchers represent the two classes who profess to be waiting for their Lord. They are called virgins because they profess a pure faith.” [Christ’s Object Lessons, page 406])

Zahakiel: Right, the Church, being alert, is “ready” for the return of Yahshua: “Let us be glad and rejoice, and give honour to Him: for the marriage of the Lamb is come, and His Wife hath made Herself ready.” (Rev 19:7)

So we have seen the spiritual aspects of this, let us look at the earthly. In an earthly sense the godly wife in the Proverb is ready, even at night, to put her talents to good use, and to guide the home. Now here is an important point – For both wives and Church members, we are told exactly how to develop this blessing: “Take ye heed, watch and pray: for ye know not when the time is.” (Mark 13:33) “Watch ye therefore, and pray always, that ye may be accounted worthy to escape all these things that shall come to pass, and to stand before the Son of man.” (Luke 21:36)

Zahakiel: These are the two things: “watch,” or practice using your discernment, and “pray always.”

Everyone good with this?

Qinael: I am.
Ron Odem: Yes.
Barb: Ok.
Crystle: Yes.

Zahakiel: Okay, just a few more to go :)
8) Effective:
You may think we have already covered this when we spoke of industriousness... but the truth is these are very different. Lots of people are always doing “something,” but not what they are supposed to be doing! I have an aunt who has what would probably be called “obsessive compulsive disorder.” She stays up almost every night until 3 or 4 am scrubbing her kitchen sink and the bathrooms. After about 10pm, I doubt they get much cleaner.

Dumah: Wow...

Zahakiel: Her husband has long since ceased trying to dissuade her from doing this, so he just lets her be... but you can clearly see the difference in what she does and in an “effective” cleansing of the house. When the Bible says talks about “busybodies,” like in the verse we saw earlier, it is putting a distinction between those who are working for Yah, and those who are busy doing... anything else. CSDAs have come into contact with many and various groups and independent ministries over the years, and to be honest most of them have a large degree of “truth” in their doctrines.

At the same time, while they do good “work” in advancing the cause of these reformations, we notice that at times they do so at the expense of the Gospel message. One gentleman Luke and I encounter in chatrooms online spends most of the time I’ve been in the same place with him harping constantly about the evils of polygamy.

Now, he personally knows (and attacks) a specific polygamist, but how common an error is that in modern Christianity? Better we teach the few polygamists to live without known sin, then they will let the Spirit tell them what to do.

Zahakiel: Some ministries are devoted to tearing down the Trinity. Well, it’s a doctrine that needs to be corrected, that is true... but better we teach the ignorant to love the Father and Son with a pure and willing heart, and they will begin see the Godhead clearly.

When I first joined the Church, I was not told anything about the Trinity being wrong... Well, when I first started studying with it.. I had not been baptized yet. But I was taught the Victory over sin; after I had claimed it, and was continuing my studies, I mentioned something about the Trinity and pastor told me, “By the way, we have come to the understanding that this teaching on the Godhead is not quite correct.” After I heard him explain what we had learned as a people, my immediate response was, “Oh, of course... I think I always knew that.” I am not sure to what extent the “always” applies to my pre-conversion experience, but with the “mind of Christ” it was the most obvious thing in the world, and my studies of Scripture and our early pioneers’ writings have only confirmed the matter.

Zahakiel: Many ministries with which we have contact spend much of their effort attacking (sometimes unkindly) Catholics and other Sundaykeeping groups. Why? What good will the 7th day do them if they do not enter into the Spiritual rest in Yahshua? Sabbathkeepers nailed Christ to the cross, and Sabbathkeepers continue to persecute many who would otherwise be saved if they had been approached in love. Yes, we must “Preach the Word; be instant in season, out of season; reprove, rebuke, exhort with all longsuffering and doctrine.” (2Tim 4:1) But we must do it with “all longsuffering and doctrine,” not “sarcasm and insults.”

This is how we will be effective; I saw a couple quotes from Mrs. White’s writings recently that said, “None but a whole hearted Christian can be a perfect gentleman, but if Christ is abiding in the soul, his Spirit will be revealed in the manner, the words, and the actions. Gentleness and love cherished in the heart, will appear in self denial, in true courtesy. Such workers will be the light of the world.” [The Paulson Collection of Ellen G. White Letters, page 398, paragraph 2] And more brief, but more to the point, “There is too much sermonizing and too little ministering.” [Selected Messages Book 2, page 380] Based on what I have seen in Christendom, I can testify that this condition has not improved in the 100+ years since that statement was set to paper.

Dumah: EGW said if we would talk more of Christ’s love and less of issues like dress reform we would see increased holiness...I think the reason that people try to cut and paste fruit rather than win the heart is because they want fast numbers to add to their minister… and it is an issue of loving debate.

Zahakiel: Right. That goes along with those. <nods.>

Now in the home, a wife’s ability to be effective can be severely diminished by the fact she is trying to be too “busy.” If she is not at rest (both physically and mentally), she will not only set a horrible example for her children, she will instill these faults of character in the young ones under her care as well. You can be “at rest” and “working” at the same time. Being “busy” is like sermonizing – “I have to get this done, I have to clean this, wipe that, cook the other.”

Parallel that to, “I have to make sure he keeps the 7th day, drops the Trinity, eats only clean foods, practices dress reform...” But ministering is different; both the evangelist and the woman ask, “What is it my children/husband/audience need?” Being able to answer that question well determines how effective you can be.

Zahakiel: Questions on Effectiveness?

Dumah: So it is an issue of the heart...that causes a person to be effective… do what he should… not what he shouldn’t?

Zahakiel: Not necessarily. It is an issue of knowing WHERE to expend your energy. The issue of the heart is how willing you are to do it.

Dumah: Ah. So one needs to educate ones self.

Zahakiel: Right. :)

Dumah: Ok.

Zahakiel: Anyone else with questions about this?

Ron Odem: None.
Qinael: None here.
Crystle: No.
Pastor “Chick”: Resting :)
Tiffany: None here.
Barb: No.

Zahakiel: Ok, good :)
9) Strong & 10) Honorable:
Two more that are intimately related. Scripture says, “Strength and honour are her clothing,” in Pro 32:25. Strength of will and character are key to the Christian experience. The thing with which we are “clothed” represents what the people outside of ourselves see. This is the reason the woman (and men) must be “adorned” with good works. The Bible teaches us that, as our brothers’ keepers, “Let your light so shine before men, that they may see your good works, and glorify your Father which is in heaven.” (Mark 9:16)

Now, “Strength” in this context comes from doing what you know to be right, despite opposition. Every human has a “cross” to bear, but the strength of your will and character are tested in these trials, and the example we set depends largely on how effectively we overcome the temptation to turn back from a right course of action. Those in Christ have an easy yoke, as the Savior told us, (Mat 11:30) because we are merely following after the One who went before, and we trust that He will handle the consequences of our obedience. The “effort” then is simply to trust, or as Paul says it, to labor to enter into that rest.

This goes back to the first attribute: trustworthiness; because trusting in Yah is what allows godly people to do the right thing, and not to be concerned with what opposes us. We may even find pleasure in opposition. Paul says, “we glory in tribulations also, knowing that tribulation worketh patience,” (Rom 5:3) and it is written that, “the joy of Yahweh is your strength.” (Neh 8:10)

Honor deals with how we treat others, so again it is a “garment” of righteousness on us, because that is what others see – it is how they judge our character. For the wife, they are told, “For after this manner in the old time the holy women also, who trusted in God, adorned themselves, being in subjection unto their own husbands.” (1 Pet 3:5) You notice the “adornment” coming up again :) Not a coincidence.

By “honoring” or being subject to their husbands, they were “adorned” with godly clothing. The Church must be composed of such to be effective, as was the early Church “Therefore many of them believed; also of honourable women which were Greeks, and of men, not a few.” (Acts 17:12) There are many verses that speak of the submission of women to their husbands, and we covered that in sufficient detail in our last study of this subject, so for a refresher on the matter of “honor” I would suggest going over that.

I would like to mention one thing before moving on, though. In that last study we saw that the role of men and women in a marriage are patterned after the Father and Son. Someone said that the Husband (or Father of the Elohim) was the Lawgiver, and the Wife (or Son of the Elohim) was the Executor of the Law. Compare that then to what we see this month, where it is written the man (particularly one who seeks a Church position) must “rule his own house,” (1Tim 3:5) and the woman must “guide” the house.

So here is a clear harmony: the man “commands” the house, and the woman “guides” the house – they are merely different types of authority.

11) Wise:
This one we have looked at in fragments in discussing our previous attributes. It deserves separate mention, because “Wisdom is the principal thing.” (Pro 4:7)

Zahakiel: Without wisdom a wife cannot convert industriousness into effectiveness, she cannot apply her discernment to make herself alert. She cannot channel her capabilities into willing service for others, and she certainly cannot be trustworthy if she is given to foolish speaking or acting. So Wisdom appears to be the “activator” that transforms internal qualities into useful, outward actions. Wisdom is also the ability to properly process the information you discern. So it works from in to out... and then from out to in.

Are you seeing what I am getting at there?

Qinael: <nods.>
Ron Odem: Yes.
Pastor “Chick”: OK.
Barb: I think so.
Dumah: Christ is the wisdom of Yah.

Zahakiel: Let me put it another way. You have abilities and qualities in you, and the environment around you has a certain set of information. Wisdom makes sure the right qualities get out, and the right information gets in :) It’s like a filter, or a screen, that lets you deal with these transfers in the proper way.

Crystle: Okay... I see.

Dumah: then we should pray for more wisdom every day.

Zahakiel: For example, you may be able to tell the difference between good and evil, but as with alertness, you have to be able to know what to DO with the choices before you. We could do a whole series of New Moon studies on the benefits of Wisdom, but we have already seen how it benefits a wife in her management of the other characteristics we have seen so far.

Pastor “Chick”: “If any man (or woman) lack wisdom...”

Zahakiel: Right. Now, in a Church setting, wisdom is certainly necessary for the great responsibilities with which we have been entrusted. Paul says, “Do ye not know that the saints shall judge the world? And if the world shall be judged by you, are ye unworthy to judge the smallest matters? Know ye not that we shall judge angels? How much more things that pertain to this life? If then ye have judgments of things pertaining to this life, set them to judge who are least esteemed in the Church.” (1Cor 6:2 – 4)

Zahakiel: Understand clearly what this is saying... Even the “least esteemed” in the Church should have the ability to settle matters between brethren. This is a high calling – it means that even our children must know enough about Gospel order, righteousness by faith, and Christian discipline to be able to mediate discussions (and therefore to manage their own lives). Just as a woman is responsible for guiding her children with wisdom, so the Church is responsible for guiding ITS children (both literally and recent converts) with wisdom and care.

At least two of you have already thought of an excellent verse for this :) “If any of you lack wisdom, let him ask of Yah, that giveth to all men liberally and upbraideth not; and it shall be given him.” (James 1:5) This is one of the rare gifts that it is said “shall be given” as the result of prayer with no conditions listed. Yes, we may have “all things” that we need as a result of prayer, but wisdom is singled out as a characteristic that Yah wants ALL His children to have ALL the time, therefore this prayer is always within His will to grant.

Pastor “Chick”: The oak tree is in the acorn.

Zahakiel: And finally...
12) Praiseworthy:
Now if a woman/wife/church has understood and kept all these first eleven, she is certainly praiseworthy. Yet notice in the verse who praises her primarily: “Her children arise up, and call her blessed; her husband also, and he praiseth her.” (Proverbs 31:28) This verse more than anything else points out the purposes of which we have been speaking. A wife’s first duty (in terms of ministry) is to her family; of course her first loyalty is to Yah, but in terms of what He would have us do for others, it must begin in the home. Now we see that this is true for both men and women in Yah’s family, for it is written of those who desire a Church office, “if a man know not how to rule his own house, how shall he take care of the Church of God?” (1Tim 3:5)

Though it has been up and down in the past, in this generation we are called to a Fellowship of those who are overcoming all sin – the very “Israel” of promise. We are those of whom Yahshua said, “To him that overcometh will I grant to sit with me in my Throne, even as I also overcame, and am set down with my Father in His Throne.” (Rev 3:21) We overcome “even as” or “in the same way as” the Son did; and by this means we become that “glorious Church, not having spot, or wrinkle, or any such thing [...] holy and without blemish.” (Eph 5:27) We obtain “praise.”

Zahakiel: Now the responsibility of a wife heavenward is precisely the same. She represents this very principle to those in the world – for by seeing the conduct of men and women in the Body of Christ, they learn who Yahweh is.

Dumah: The children of the woman are the fruit or works of the church… it is interesting that it is the children that praise her...”wisdom is known of her children” so just a godly woman’s children praise her...so the fruits of a church either praise or condemn it.

Zahakiel: As Christ said “he that hath seen me hath seen the Father,” (John 14:9) so may we ALL say this, and women not the least. Even the heavenly beings learn more about the nature of the Almighty by observing the conduct of human beings, created in His image: “but unto us [previous messengers] did minister the things, which are now reported unto you by them that have preached the Gospel unto you with the Holy Ghost sent down from heaven; which things the angels desire to look into.” (1Pet 1:12)

And of marriage specifically, the relationship between the wife and husband we are told, “For this cause ought the woman to have power on her head because of the angels.” (1Cor 11:10) Without getting too much into the details of that chapter (that, again, is another full study) – the basic idea is that as the Father is the “head” of the Son, the Son the “head” of the Church – so is the husband the “head” of the wife. This relationship, discussed in greater detail last time, means much to our invisible observers.

Pastor “Chick”: Amen.

Zahakiel: And so we see that every task given to the “wife” in a godly marriage is given to the Church by Yahshua the Bridegroom. Every work, from the least to the most exalted, has meaning in the Gospel ministry – and must not be neglected. If we, as a people, will stand before the Throne “without spot, or blemish,” we must all consider how these characteristics apply in our own lives – not only as wives and women, but as men and husbands. How well do we understand these traits, and encourage them in others? Remember, the purpose of order and headship in the Church is “for the perfecting of the saints,” (Eph 4:12) and as Paul said, “Let us therefore, as many as be perfect, be thus minded; and if in any thing ye be otherwise minded, Yah shall reveal even this unto you.” (Phl 3:15)

Zahakiel: Are there any questions before we close with a prayer?

Tiffany: None here.
Qinael: None here.
Ron Odem: None.
Pastor “Chick”: Satisfied.
Barb: No.
Crystle: No questions.

Zahakiel: Okay :) Let’s pray, then. And I will be around afterward for a little while in case people have questions that are not as directly related.

Almighty and loving Father in Heaven,

We thank you for this opportunity to gather in your name. Although one method of meeting was withheld from us, you provided an alternative that has worked just as well. We thank you that you have a thousand ways of which we know not, and that you have desired this meeting of your people on this day of humility and bonding. We thank you for the presence of your Spirit, which binds us together as one, and that shapes us and guides us to the place we need to be before the persecution breaks forth. Let us consider these characteristics of a godly wife, and let us realize that whatsoever things a wise man looks for in a bride, these are the things you seek in us, your servants.

By your Spirit, only by your power, are we trustworthy, and discerning, capable and industrious. Only by your life lived in us are we willing, kind, alert, effective and strong. Only because you first loved us can we be honorable, wise and finally praiseworthy, for all that is within us worthy of praise, you have placed within us as a perfect Seed.

Dismiss us with your love, that we may go forth as lights into a dark world, and show others the way to the Body, to the Bride, and to our everlasting reward. In Yahshua’s name we thank you for these things,
Amen.

Qinael: Amen.
Dumah: Amen.
Barb: Amen.
Ron Odem: Amen.
Crystle: Amen.
Tiffany: Amen.
Clair: Amen.
Pastor “Chick”: Amen.